I’ve been coming to terms with moving and how it won’t change what I plan to do with my life, which is write (and possibly act, depending on what’s available in the place my mother and I are moving to). I could easily try and find a job in NYC and find a few roommates to stay in NY, but I have time to do that, and who’s to say the writing thing won’t work out?
I also realized, as of an hour or so ago, that one of my IRL friends (she’s not on Tumblr, so it’s not any of you I’ve met in person, don’t worry) tried to convince me to get my mom to look into moving just across the river, to Rockland County in Nyack, NY. But I’ve given up on that, decided to let my mom have her way this time, that it’s not the end of the world. And the reason she wanted me to stay is because she wanted to keep me close.
She used terms like “Once you get there, you’ll never get out,” which is NEVER true about any place. I don’t know about outside of the country, since I’ve never left this one for others, but I can say for sure, “I’ll be able to leave on my own terms, but you won’t be controlling me like you think you will. Not now, not ever.”
And it feels nice to say that… in my mind. But can I say that to her face? Yes, I can. it hasn’t happened yet, but it probably will, eventually. Of course she won’t like it, but that’s life, and life goes on. I’m sure I’m not the only friend she’s ever had, or ever will have. She’ll be fine.