Featured Image -- 2008

When My Black Brothers Hate Me

Originally posted on Black Millennial Musings:

Today, a casting call for the highly-anticipated N.W.A. movie “Straight Outta Compton” was posted on the Internetz for all the world to see. The post called for girls of all shapes, sizes, and colors. As diverse and inviting such a notion could be, it was clear that a celebration of female diversity wasn’t in the works. Take a look…

Casting Call

That’s right. Categorizing women from Type A to Type D, light-skinned, racially ambiguous, big booty women were rated “hottest of the hottest,” while dark skinned women were relegated to the lowest of the low.

Infuriating doesn’t express my angst. Exasperation barely captures my annoyance with *some* Black men and their subservience to white dominance. Pity and shame nearly espouses my convictions towards the Black men who perpetuate white supremacy by devaluing the beauty of Black womanhood.

Black women know the struggles we face. From our hair to our looks, we’re constantly poked…

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Featured Image -- 2006

21 Tips for Millennial Survival

Originally posted on Black Millennial Musings:

To my fellow Millennials,

I know it’s difficult entering into adulthood amidst constant political bickering, fluctuating demographics, economic uncertainty, and increased globalization. Here’s some quick tips for surviving it all.

1. Lose your ego. You don’t deserve to have one…yet.

We all read that GYPSY article that obliterated our perceived sense of self worth. Well it’s true…unless you’re a 20 year old super genius, you are not that special. To employers and admissions counselors, you are just another 20something with an overpriced degree. You might’ve studied in France for a semester, was a model UN delegate, or did a government internship… but so did a million other people.

As a 20something in 2014, you deserve NOTHING. You must work for EVERYTHING. At least at this stage of the game. Eventually, you’ll earn your boss status. But that takes more time and recognition than being student body president.

2. It’s never…

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Featured Image -- 2000

The Daily Musing: 6.30.14.

dederants:

The Supreme Court decision especially pissed me off and continues to do so…

Originally posted on Black Millennial Musings:

The Daily Musing: Today’s top stories in Black media

1. SCOTUS Regulates Vaginas Everywhere

The Black: In yet another repudiation of President Obama and his message of inclusiveness, the Supreme Court ruled that for-profit employers can deny birth control coverage based on personal religious beliefs. The ruling strikes a blow to Obamacare and women’s rights, and sets a resounding precedent that, not only are companies people, but they’re allowed to marginalize vulnerable populations based on ambiguous religious tenets.

The Musing: It’s clear that SCOTUS has turned into a partisan entity, with conservative justices further crippling precarious rights and privileges. The fates of vaginas are being decided by these hunks.

2. Beyonce is the Most Powerful Celebrity in 2014

Photo Cred: Forbes

Photo Cred: Forbes

The Black: Forbes named Beyonce the most powerful celebrity of 2014, beating out Oprah, who dropped from 1 to 4. Beyonce’s feats are hard to…

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Shedding My Pretend Skin

I’ve been thinking about things recently (don’t worry; not deleting this blog LOL), and I wonder about my frame of mind when it comes to Tumblr.

It’s not Tumblr’s fault, but my brain somehow rewired itself to accommodate the information overload on my dash. In the now six years I’ve been on Tumblr, I’ve learned so much about other cultures, racism and prejudice, feminism, reproductive rights, religion, etc. Yet I question my way of thinking as a result.

My thoughts are connected to the urge to please people. That’s what I learned in high school, or throughout my life in general, to stay in someone’s good graces; while I’ve spent years trying to undo the behavior and learn to truly think for myself, I’m reverting back to my old ways. It’s easier to play along, but I’m not my full self. Once people/followers leave my life, I’m a hollow shell, not knowing much of what to do without them around.

It takes me some time, after wasting much of it deciphering what went wrong, to comprehend that I need to think and do for myself. Yeah, people come and go, but I don’t need to create life around them just to keep them around.

Also, what may be comfortable to me may not be comfortable to others. But I’m fully aware that because of this, I don’t need to change myself to benefit them. So why do I continue to do it?

At some point or another in our lives, many of us meet people we like, whether it’s what we see on the outside or their personality that attracts us, like moths to a flame. But over time, the people we were once attracted to become either boring or do things that go against our personal beliefs (and those beliefs are not always religious). I’ve always wanted to fit in, but I’ve also always wanted to make some kind of impact, leave a footprint behind for others.

I have experienced the other side, being the one people are attracted to, and have struggled to keep it going. It wasn’t long before I realized many of them are attracted to me as I am, which is what I want. But for some reason, there’s the internal (and sometimes external) pressure to keep up the celebrity, and in order to do that, we have to do certain things to keep people interested.

I’ve always wanted to be famous, because it seemed so glamorous, and I’ve always wanted to prove my worth through the excitement of other people seeing someone as awesome as me in the public eye, just as I am. The only thing keeping me from that spotlight: I’m not willing to do just anything for it. I’ve not made a sex tape or taken nude photos (I’m sure that wouldn’t be a pretty site, anyway, nor am I brave enough to do either), nor would I want to do a reality show, considering what they’ve come to be nowadays. I have thought about it, though, but I’m not one for confrontation. And I don’t want to change myself for the sake of making other people comfortable and unthreatened, for I’m a Black woman.

Seeing what the famous go through on a daily basis (being told what to do/say, what to wear, which projects to take on), I rather appreciate my privacy, paparazzi not standing outside of my home or a restaurant I’m eating at just to get a photo or provoke a reaction from me.

Periodically, I ask my followers for any questions they may have for me, and I’ve been lucky enough to not get anon hate; the ones I have gotten were few and far in between, and I know to delete them if need be.

These days, I’m not too hesitant to speak my mind on something (although many times I either write it in my notebook just to get it out or put it under a cut), and if someone doesn’t agree, it’s okay. They don’t have to, and I don’t have to agree with them. It’s called agreeing to disagree, or compromise. I do, however, take much consideration to what I’m writing, which I still wonder about. There are words I use that are policed by people who are ridiculously sensitive to them, and it makes me questions political correctiveness, specifically in cases of race.

At this point of my life, I should never have a problem being myself. The realization that racism still exists, and that I’m a Black woman living in a White Male World, is a reminder that life isn’t going to conform to make me comfortable. I have to do that for myself. I’m not going to be liked by everyone, regardless of exterior or interior, but I need to love myself, and things will only get better from there.

Featured Image -- 1992

How Feminism Killed Chivalry

Originally posted on Black Millennial Musings:

Yesterday, I stood cramped on a rush hour A train headed home. The sweltering heat was only exacerbated by an army of over-worked NYC dwellers and a non-functioning AC. In the middle of the crowded train stood a mother and her young son. The wailing child was uncomfortable, and the mother tried unsuccessfully to calm him.

As if by fate, there was a row of three men sitting in front of her. Not one offered their seat.

This is a situation I’ve seen time and time again. A struggling mother who could use a moment of relaxation, only to be met with rudeness. I’ve seen pregnant women standing, while men pretend she is invisible. Women who navigate between screaming children and bags of groceries, only to be ignored.

That’s the thing about trains… you’ll learn a lot about cultural mores and social norms if you dare to pay attention.

When…

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Featured Image -- 1990

The Gentrification of Hip Hop

Originally posted on Black Millennial Musings:

Does the above picture bother you? Well it should.

Yesterday, New York Daily News published this enlightening piece about how white rappers are taking over hip hop due to their race. And it’s true; viewed as oddities within hip hop culture, white rappers automatically receive high levels of attention. Throw in that most consumers of hip hop are white, and together, white rappers receive praise, accolades, and hype …which eventually translate to album sales, YouTube views, etc.

Hip hop is being gentrified.

As hip hop merges into pop culture and is backed by corporate dollars, hip hop is transforming into something that it was never meant to be. When the pioneers of hip hop sought out creative outlets to express their politics, frustrations, aspirations, and daily realities, they had no idea that hip hop would catch in the ways that it did. And now, these humble beginnings (borne out of…

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